Precocious and full of Wonderment.

I recently went to see a couple of my favorite bands perform at the Tabernacle in Atlanta, GA and it was very good. I have always liked mewithoutYou and Brand New. But seeing them live gives me an altogether new respect for their music.

mewithoutYou's performance was honestly very worshipful to me. I mean. During their set it was very easy for me to see their love for God and the new life he has given them. They exude Joy. And seeing them made me joyful by association.

Seeing Brand New gave me a sense of desire. A desire to show love to someone. A desire to know. A desire for passion. Brand New's music is entirely passionate. And the lyrics are so personal to the band. You feel as if they just gave you a glimpse of something rare and highly treasured. Or just let you in on an inside joke.

If you haven't seen either of these bands...or if you just have never heard of or heard them. I urge you to give them a chance. They were very good.

No cigar.

So I am reading "The Great Divorce" by C. S. Lewis. And Mr. Lewis being infinitely smarter than me has opened my eyes once again. I have a problem with being content with what I have. And as he explains in his book, whatever we have on earth is nothing compared to the truth we will have from God. The true love. True beauty. True identity. We so often mistake love here as the highest form. It is counterfeit in comparison. Lewis says that " Brass is mistaken for Gold much easier than Clay."

How true is that? I mean...we all get to some point and we think that's as good as it gets. But God is infinite. Why aren't our relationships with Him infinite as well? Every encounter with God should be the most we have ever felt Him. We are constantly moving right? We never stay the same. So if we are not swimming upstream we are being swept downstream.

Awkward Hellos.

I am an introvert. It is very easy to tell that I am. I never say hi to anyone I haven't had a lengthy conversation with. And recently people have been telling me that their opinions about my character, before having a lengthy conversation, were that I was a jerk. I realize this sounds crazy if you know me. But I think its because I don't talk to people. I mean I talk. But I just don't greet people with a smile very often. And I am awkward at best. I have been working on this. Because it is not very like me to be short with people. I have so much to say sometimes I lose words. I am a boiling pot of ideas, emotions, and opinions. But I never go all in with someone. I don't open up very often.

Lately, I have been sparking conversations with random people. I am trying to tune in to their stations. To listen to them. I feel like I have so much love for people, but I don't give myself opportunities to show it. It is a minute by minute fight for me to reach out. I'm sure some who read may know better than I how hard it is. But this is just me battling me again. Same old story.

One of my favorite people always points out how God loves us where we are and loves us so much not to leave us there. I want to convey that love. The love that God has for me at my lowest and highest. The love that God has for me that he rescues me on a daily basis. He has set my feet on a path and I am tripping all along the way. But I am determined to make it even if I have to crawl.

This determination isn't a concrete thing for me either. It is a constant decision. But like I said. Minutes are decisions and every decision is important.

If you are awkward at best I know it is hard to reach out. But it's just a decision you have to make for yourself. I do every minute. Haha.

All in.

Fwd:
Originally uploaded by itscreesh

So. This is a pic of Randy and I going all in. We decided the Elephant Ear was worth eating without utensils so we dove in...

I have trouble with going all in for something. I look at this and realize I can. and I chuckle a bit.

Office party

So Albany has a Chili's now....and me and a friend were chatting over lunch there today. I put forth the idea of having an "Office party" there. In lieu of one of our favorite tv shows "The Office". We want to have a dundies ceremony. Business formal.. haha...we should. really.

Clean Breaks.

I believe in clean breaks...Nuff said right? Wrong..The more I mature. The more I realize. Clean breaks are hard. It is hard to leave anything behind. But God has been working in me an awful lot lately. I am finding out that every minute is a decision. And every decision an important one. I mean. Our life is one minute, right? I have decided to stop a lot of things lately. But like I said. Clean breaks are impossible without His help.